I explained it to St. Peter,
I'd rather stay here, outside the pearly gate.
I won't be a nuisance, I won't even bark.
I'll be very patient and wait.
I'll be here chewing on a celestial bone
No matter how long you may be.
I'd miss you so much, if I went in alone.
It wouldn't be heaven for me.

unknown author; but it could be Small Fry